clauderainsrm (clauderainsrm) wrote in therealljidol,

Green Room - Week 10 - Day 5

Why are you posting?

You have thoughts all the time. Some of them make it out there in the world, and others don't.

You decide which ones are worth leaving your fingers and going out there in the world. Sometimes it might be what you had for dinner. But other times, it's what you think about an issue that is important to you, or something that you find annoying.

Are you putting it out there to have an echo chamber of agreement? A conversation? Sympathy? Empathy? Hearing that you are not alone?

Because you have a reason. Even if it's "just because I wanted to", there is an expectation of what you want to receive in response. Otherwise, you wouldn't put it out on the internet.

Which is why I find reactions to responses so interesting.

(Any resemblance to anyone affiliated with Idol is both intentional *and* a coincidence. Because these topics came up in about 5 different places over the weekend, and I'm sure one of those had Idol people involved. So not talking about anyone specifically, BUT if you recognize yourself, you may have inspired this thought process, which contains a lot of half-formed thoughts and probably me saying several stupid things in the process! :D) )

The two discussions that spurred the thought process in *my* head were "The meaning of Memorial Day" and "Discussion that lead to 'Not All Men" (the latter being on several different original topics that all led to the same place)

Memorial Day summaries: "Memorial Day is about honoring those who gave their lives serving their country!"
"I love veterans!!!!"
"OK, but that's Veteran's Day."
(Note: I also saw this conversation flipped as well)

This one reminds me of the Mother's Day one where people point out that the holiday originated being about the role of women taking political and social action on behalf of making a better life for their kids - while the more modern definition seems to be focused on "You gave birth".

Everyone has points. But the discussions rarely go well. One side is making the "historically" point, while another comes from an emotional "this is how I WANT it to be!"

Which is a world away from the more intellectual discussions that tend to end up being about "Not All Men". For those who *don't* know what this is about, it's when a woman starts talking about her experiences with sexism (or pretty much everything) and makes a generalized statement about "men". Then a guy jumps in and says "Well NOT ALL MEN".

Here's the problem - of course he's right. Making generalizations about an entire group of people is inherently wrong as well as being logically faulty. (Anyone who makes extreme statements about entire groups of people should be executed!!!! :p)

Here's the bigger problem - of course he's wrong. Because it has absolutely *nothing to do* with the actual conversation that is taking place, and by jumping in with that, he's just sidetracking the whole conversation to being about him. Which is pretty f-ed up.

I'll completely admit to jumping in on conversations! But they tend to be on my friend's posts, when things seem a little tense, and I'll say something stupid or silly to lighten the place up. Most of the time when I do that on facebook, it's so that I can get notifications to see the rest of the conversation as it unfolds.

One thing that got me this weekend though, because it was interesting and made me think about the idea of posting and commenting on another level - was that most of these conversations that I came across had at least one person coming out and saying that men don't have a place in a discussion, and shouldn't be commenting at all, about such things in something that is intended to be a "safe feminist space".

That very phrase was used in each case. Which made me wonder: Is your blog/facebook/LJ posts a "safe feminist space"? (I'm using that as an example, but I've seen the same things said about open discussions about issues impacting PoC. Although I haven't seen an "Not All White People meme go viral. Maybe it has and I just wasn't paying attention!!)

Are you only posting to certain people? If so, why not restrict it? Filters exist. People let certain people into their circles, and stop other people from coming into them.

Which is more control that most people have in the rest of their lives.

It's weird, because I was agreeing with everything they were saying, right up until that. Then it became a question mark of "What is the intention of the post?" and the bigger "what is the intention of your personal space as a whole?"

Is it a safe place FOR YOU to talk about things with friendly faces that will agree? Is it a place to bounce around ideas with friends? (as long as no one is an asshat about it, which is always the part people seem to forget, disagreeing with someone is *usually* OK, as long as you don't act like an asshat!)

Why do YOU post and what do you expect from the people commenting?


NOTE: Because there seems to have been a lot of confusion, the deadline for this weeks topic is THURSDAY. Not today. Not yesterday. Not two weeks ago. This coming Thursday.

The Work Room is still open for people who need extra help:
Tags: day 05, green room, season 9, week 10
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