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In the most awkward topic transition of all time – yesterday I found out some news from an old friend/neighbor.
I haven’t talked to her (let’s call her S) in years, she was more of my ex-wife’s friend than mine, at one point they were best friends - but we are on each other’s facebook, and there was a point where, since we lived a couple apartments away from each other for several years, that we saw each other every day…
Her sister also used to live in the same complex. So I didn’t know her as well, but she lived immediately below us… and anyone who has ever lived in an apartment complex knows that means we pretty much lived in each other’s pockets at times.
The sister (let’s call her N) had a daughter that her mother was raising and (when we first met her) was a recovering drug addict. (hence the decision to sign over custody). It’s fair to say that she wasn’t in a good place when we met, but always seemed nice enough.
Over the years, N apparently had her good moments and her bad – but the last time I had heard, was doing “OK”.
S posted yesterday to let people know what had happened over the weekend…
N hanged herself in S’s garage.
I don’t know many more details than that, other than the fact that S was out of town, and that she found the body when she got home.
Part of me wonders how you could make the decision to end it all, especially like that… but I know that I’ve had my own history with at least considering “the options”…
More of me though is angry that – having made that choice – how could you put even more of a burden on someone who has always been there for you, by hanging yourself *in their garage*… S has a pre-teen son who could have easily been the one to find his Aunt… (as if finding *your sister* isn’t a bad enough thing…)
S hasn’t been back to the house since then. She doesn’t know when she will be able to do it.
I can’t even begin to wrap my brain around any of it.