November 21st, 2011


Green Room - Week 5 - Day 4

Later this week, ‘Mericans from all around my apartment will gather together to eat vast amounts of food, and give thanks to the One True God, Mark Burnett, for all that he gives us throughout the year.

I’m not sure why, but apparently he manifests himself in the form of cats, who demand tribute on this day. Really, they demand tribute every single day. But how can you argue with the manifestation of the One True God? You can’t. So far, the gifts of tribute have been working. I give them food, and OTG keeps giving me episodes of Survivor. Also, they have kept away the damn foreigners from moving in and taking our ‘Merican housing and jobs!

I’ve heard rumors that other people celebrate something similar – and around fictional “world” that people pretend to be from, that they have their own celebrations at different times a year that involve giving thanks to Mark Burnett, or whatever they call Him in their made up “languages”. I won’t pretend to understand them. Because you people make no sense. Just a bunch of random words thrown together to mimic actual communication. But if you do have a celebration that mimics the One True one. then good for you! You are partway toward becoming Real ‘Mericans!!

If you don’t – then I guess that’s just one more reason why you can’t be trusted, and we need to build the fence higher to keep you out!!

Which is the ‘Merican Way! As it says on the Statue of Liberty (location in front of my door): “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, so I can make them write every week, and eliminate them.”

This week’s topic thread, to link your entries and to read ahead, is at and the Work Room (if you want to take advantage of the extra day to write) is at