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Green Room - Week 24 - Day 10

Today is the day the polls close and we say goodbye: http://therealljidol.livejournal.com/1032526.html Who is it going to be that is leaving though? The poll numbers are *really* close, so I have no clue at this point.

If you have some opinions about entries folks may be missing out on - now would be the chance to speak up about it, or be prepared to wave goodbye to the people who wrote them.

***

With a daughter about to enter high school, I was thinking of my own first day of high school. There were some bad things, but a couple of good ones. Mainly that my very first class was Creative Writing where I met a couple of seniors "metal heads" that were sitting beside me in the back of the class. No idea what made them start talking to me, but they did and that made my 9th grade year go *much* better than it could have. (there's nothing quite like having someone want to fight you - because who doesn't want to beat up on someone who stutters! That will teach them!!! - , and then having a good portion of the metal seniors show up to tell them if they want to fight me, they have to fight *them*.

They were really cool guys and a few months back I decided to look them up on Facebook. (well, one of them - the one with the distinctive name. I couldn't recall the others last name.) I found him and sent him a message that went right into his spam folder since we weren't friends. I just wanted to say "Thank you". Even if he had no memory of who I was, I remembered him and everything they did for me.

A couple days ago, he happened to see that there were messages in his spam folder and read them. He wrote me back, and sent me a friends request. Then he forwarded my message to his friend (they still know each other) and he friended me as well!

Apparently they both *did* remember me. Which does make sense. People remember you if you are weird, and if there is something distinctive about you... a weird guy who stutters? Yeah, that's going to stick with folks!

Which is good - except of course it means I can't pretend to be someone else if I run into someone I *don't* want to see. ;)


***
What do you think people remember about YOU???

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
penpusher
Jul. 21st, 2017 03:03 pm (UTC)
Having attended eleven different schools before graduating high school is a sure way to have no one remember you.

Part of it was my parents' doing, as when they were getting divorced, I attended three different first grades. But part of it was my own doing, when I ran away from home in third grade (specifically because in my debrief about meeting my friends from school - none of whom ran away, mind you, they only talked about it as if they actually would - going to Florida meant meeting "go-go girls") my mom must have thought I was a precocious sexual freak (not that eight year old me had any concept of what a go-go girl actually was, or what I might do with one if I somehow got one - I didn't even know "the facts of life" yet). The result was continual movement from school to school so that I never established any kind of "social" life. Also the fact that I was never permitted to go out on my own at any time guaranteed that I would not be a part of any group. I was permanently grounded for my entire undergrad life.

It also didn't help that the schools were all tiny. My entire senior class was thirty-nine people. That's a really small pool to try and select friends from, especially when you can't hang out, go to any parties or spend any time at all outside of class and brief extracurriculars, about an hour after the end of the day and on school grounds only.

If people did remember me, it's probably due to bad things. The boys who talked about running away were all beaten because of my thoughtless actions, and I suspect they remember me. Certainly they all stopped talking to me for the rest of the year and have not been heard from, since.

Perhaps I was remembered as being the only minority student in my 5th grade school, as I was a constant target of venting their hate and derision that entire year. Or maybe I was forgotten because when you earn a victory, over time, you don't really remember the loser.

I did attend a high school gathering about a dozen years ago.The handful of classmates didn't know me because I was very clean cut back then and now have long hair and a beard but once they heard who I was, they did remember me. And there were a couple of guys who were a couple of years younger, and I guess they looked up to the Seniors with admiration (and without the actual knowledge of what that was all about) so they remembered me, but I didn't really know them. It was like hero worship from afar, which is the same as it not happening, if we're being honest. Those guys never interacted with me.

I think the lesson of my life is that you need people to help you through it. Yes, being a writer is a solitary path, but you still need people around who like you, who joke with you, who share their lives and who can inspire you. You still need people to support you, to care about what you do, to tell you the truth and who do it with love. You still need to find a place that is yours, where you belong, a place where you are good to be you because if you don't have that place, you will never get to live YOUR life. This lesson may have come too late for me, but maybe, the next time I enter into a new group of people, those that don't know my past and those that won't judge me on who I am, it might help things go more smoothly.
murielle
Jul. 21st, 2017 06:24 pm (UTC)
That must have been so difficult when you were a child, particularly. As children, so much of our maturation is dependent on interaction with peers, and building relationships with them. And apart from that, (!!!!) that's an awfully lonely existence for a child. Kudos to you for surviving!

I am sort of in touch with a friend (that's one) close friend from grade school. I say sort of in touch because we talk two or three times a year. There's another friend who writes once a year. But my friends from school are few and far between.
penpusher
Jul. 22nd, 2017 02:18 am (UTC)
I think surviving is all I did really. I certainly never really got to form the sorts of relationships that last. Yes, I'm in touch with a couple of people from previous classes, but I feel more connected to some LJ users that I have never met than I do with them. I don't think this makes me unique but it does help explain the world view I have. Thanks for your thoughts about it... and for sharing a bit of your story.
murielle
Jul. 21st, 2017 06:32 pm (UTC)
I haven't a clue what other people remember about me other than I loved the Bee Gees. Although we moved a lot, I always made friends, had people to hang around with, etc. Still I was never that social. I liked reading and writing and daydreaming, not really group activities. :-)
swirlsofblue
Jul. 21st, 2017 06:48 pm (UTC)
In the yearbook I was 'weirdest conversation starter' I think that pretty much sums it up :)
beeker121
Jul. 21st, 2017 06:50 pm (UTC)
Probably that I was the odd girl who wore her t-shirts upside down. I could talk to everyone but other than the drama folks wasn't really a part of anyone's group.
favoritebean
Jul. 21st, 2017 07:25 pm (UTC)
Hi GR. I am finally back home from two weeks away. I have been reading, but unable to comment on entries. Hopefully, I can comment today. Some are really good.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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